Caught up in between what was past and what could pass me by. I still am figuring it out for myself. I can't rush how my thoughts are running in my head or all the mess in my chest. It's no way to be. What is truly unfair is how my head and heart can't agree for too long, and then I feel undeserving. I get ashamed and disappointed with the way it is and how I'm stuck. Everyday I see my former dreams and what is realistically now.. Then nothing makes any sense to me. One day I get it. The next I tumble back down to the floor, trying to make it out alright because I can't stay down. There are times I wish for so much, but they are simply empty hopes. The ending has already been told.. I can't have an epilogue to something gone. But I'm not worthy of this right now. Time needs to go harder. I am just glad I have such a good friend to lean on when I can't do it alone, when I can't sleep because it cuts, when it's too late at night to turn to anyone else.

So hey, thanks for lifting me back up.